Tim is back with his Alone couch commentary as a bunch of pretty rough and ready survivalists front up for a few months in NZ’s soggy fiord country. Chur!

 

G’day legends, or should I say kia ora? We all know that KIA is a major sponsor of Alone Australia but changing countries for that brand placement was a big move.

Yes Alone Australia is back and, to address the food source elephant in the room, it’s over in New Zealand. I asked Exec Producer Riima about this last week and the answer was what you’d expect. People want to see active hunting, they want the drama of bow and arrow shots, and that’s just really hard to get going in Australia.

Season 1 ended up being an almighty great battle, but it could’ve landed with a thud. Looking at the cast list for Season 2, I reckon the standard’s jumped up a notch. Based on nothing but their ‘vibes’ of course, I feel like I felt that way before Season 1 kicked off.

Let’s tuck in shall we?

*Spoiler alert* Alone Australia Season 2 Episode 1 spoilers from here!

 

Want to know about the latest season? Check out our guide to Alone Australia Season 3 for everything you need to know!

 

 

Damn it’s scenic

Episode 1 Recap

We begin with a nice acknowledgement of the Ngāi Tahu people who welcomed the crew onto the land. It’s so great that SBS create this properly and actually do the work to ensure their production doesn’t create harm.

Now a quote: ‘Beauty is terror. Whatever we call beautiful, we quiver before it.’ – Donna Tartt

A pretty spicy quote from an American novelist. Is it true though? I can probably think of a dozen examples where it’s not.

On the beach as your boat pulls away though, I can see that being quiverworthy.

Rick confirms it with the voiceover: ‘If you don’t respect the environment here it will slap you hard’.

How often do you reckon we’ll hear Rick’s voice being sampled? His voice is so distinctive and he has a great turn of phrase. You can listen to a whole podcast episode of his gruff musings on our recent episode where he and I had a yarn.

Ok, this is funny. Why does the map start over Australia and just swing out east? That was a choice, and it’s funny. Are we explaining where New Zealand is to people? Are we claiming it as an Australian island? Bizarre.

I nearly had a stroke trying to write the next section as we wheeled through all ten contestants arriving at their little patch of wilderness.

 

Quick thoughts:

  • Andreas is bringing terminator energy and I can’t wait to see his self-filming
  • Suzan is quoted as saying it’s a ‘mental game’. Damn right it is. Quietly, she’s my pick
  • Krystof just seems super wacky
  • Jack seems incredibly confident, that’ll be interesting
  • Mike is pretty pumped to win $250k

I love how the beaches look so similar to Alone Australia Season 1 but also so so different.

Chace says they’re on a lake that’s 200m above sea level and just as deep. That helps place the location as (quite likely) Lake Manapouri, but they’re spread out over a wide region, with some sites up to 50km apart.

 

Class is in session

Chace

Ok, we’re starting with Chace, who’s a Quandamooka man! That’s the region around what we call Moreton Bay. He’s also in the military, which is pretty common for Alone but doesn’t always mean they know what they’re doing, we’ll see I guess!

Chace tells us that namu means ‘sandfly’ as they crawl over his hands, his gear, and even the camera’s lens. Yuuuck. Sandflies are awful, unlike mosquitoes these ‘biting midges’ often swarm, and their small bites are often clustered and can turn into ulcers or cause really bad allergic reactions. I genuinely wonder if this could be a reason someone heads home early.

 

Rick just watching the sandflies swarm

 

Anyways, if Chace isn’t allergic to sandflies and wins the $250k, he’s gonna buy a farm. Sorry but, did farms get cheaper? It’s still a decent amount of money, but considering what they have to go through to get it, I was kind of expecting an increase for inflation.

(Spoiler for Season 1) That being said, apparently Gina Chick is in Antarctica right now, so it doesn’t hurt!

Read more: Interview with Gina Chick

Tamika

Speaking of Gina, is Tamika our season two Gina? There’s no possum fur coat (everyone took a sleeping bag this time – see the full gear list).

Tamika’s zone seems quite open, she’s able to get up the hill a little away from the water. Maybe it’ll be less dank up there? More open to wildlife passing through? Turns out she’s a bloody national champion with a bow and arrow, but there’s a twist.

She’s vego. Tamika hasn’t eaten meat in eight years. It sounds like she knows what to do with a kill, and will happily fish, but surely she’s going to have to overcome that quickly if she wants a chance to win.

She also can’t eat fungi thanks to the rules and sAfEtY, which is a pity because there are heaps.

 

Hunting with a bow is second nature to Tamika

Mike

Good old Mike. Turns out he was a wilderness teacher at a school two We Are Explorers staff went to, so they’re backing him pretty hard.

He’s totally vibing out, I think he’s having a double rainbow moment right now. I love how some contestants are worried or getting right to it and others are just like ‘I love nature :)’.

Mike’s a big strong fella, he just lifted such a big log, I wonder if that’s gonna mean his fuel needs are higher? Has anyone noticed that the contestants don’t look that chunky? It’s hard to know but no one looks particularly larger than their background video.

Ok so Mike’s goal is 100 days, that’s ‘the benchmark’ in his eyes. One down eh?

 

Mike’s shelter looked very taut and sturdy

Rick

Ok if I thought Mike was soul vibing I should have waited for Rick. This man is in his element!

The way he’s talking through his options and priorities is reminiscent of Mike from Season 1, but I feel that Rick’s going to approach things quite differently. He’s made a reference to seeing his options like he’s ‘in a game of Fortnite’ which is bloody hilarious. Rick’s big on TikTok despite being one of the least likely to be there.

Actually, a source at SBS told me that one of the contestants doesn’t even own a mobile, I’m gonna spend all season working out who it is.

Look at that shelter. Mwah! No notes. Actually so far no one has made a crappy shelter, which probably shows how the standard is perhaps a level up on last time.

Rick’s also found deer tracks on the beach. Something tells me this might be a long, long season.

But the sandflies are coming back in…

 

Rick’s rig reveal was a highlight

Chace

Back to Chace and he’s said something about being a hunter and having a gatherer at home and now he needs to be the gather and honestly what? My partner Mary is rolling her eyes haha.

Chace has decided to boil up some Supplejack to eat, which seems like a deadset random thing to do this early on. He’s also starting a fire in a kind of weird spot where there’s no protection from rain? Far from me to be a couch survivalist (I love it) but in somewhere that gets *checks notes* 7,000mm of rain, I feel that keeping things like a fire pit dry should be immediate top priority.

For reference, I live in Sydney which received its most rain on record in 2022 at 2522mm. Not only did this scarily break the record by 300mm, but it rained almost every second day and everything always felt wet.

This is nearly THREE TIMES that amount of rain. Jesus wept. Potentially literally.

Anyway Chace is struggling to get a fire lit with this wet wood.

‘If at first you don’t succeed, what are you gonna do? Drop your showbag and throw your lollies everywhere? Nup.’ Sorry Chace, what are you talking about?

Anyway, he’s got it lit and he’s made a good point that a fire right now is more for his head than anything else. Which is good, because the Supplejack tastes like asparagus.

Leanne

Leanne’s a Barkindji woman, a group from Country out near Mildura that centres around the Darling River and extends north past Wilcannia.

This dense, moist forest would be very different to Leanne’s normal experience of going bush in Outback NSW, I hope the pre show training treated her well. But as she says, she’s also strong because she’s nanya, which means ‘stubborn’. Same gurl.

Hahaha and she’s also spurred on because *big reveal* she’s married to Rob from Season 1.

Remember Rob? Wholesome chats with the ancestors of the land, dreadlocks, spent a few hours looking at a family photo, lasted a single day?

Yeah, I get the feeling Leanne’s gonna last a bit longer. She seems serious and very driven. I’m excited to watch her journey.

 

Rob’s about to get a bit more single-parent time than Leanne, I reckon

Rick

I’m just gonna bring it back to Rick here for some kind of continuity.

He’s on the beach again, just meditating before GOING FOR A SWIM?! The water is six degrees dude, are you ok?

Rig reveal though, look at those traps. He’s just walking into freezing water like it’s nothing.

I’m not sure what the affirmation was about when Rick came out of the water but it was very intense, we’re getting some very intimate eye contact with Rick. Not mad about it.

It looks like Rick’s setting up close to the water, which is interesting. Sandflies love, well, sand but the forest behind him looks thick and dank too. One risk raised by my friend Rach is the lake water rising quickly after heavy rain – something to watch.

Just like on his TikTok, Rick has blown my mind with his plan to heat a rock and put it in a hollow log to then dry wood for a fire. Damn, that’s kind of genius.

 

Alright Scorsese

 

What’s interesting about Rick’s scenes is that they feel very prepared, like he’s put aside time to film a few segments and is then probably just going ham on his setup without the camera running as much. While some of the other segments feel more ad hoc.

I reckon that’s why we get a final scene of Rick down at the water again having a yarn and skipping stones.

Skipping stones really well I might add. I just need you to know that I went to the premiere and the whole cinema cheered when that stone just kept on going.

Aww, it’s his wife’s 60th too and he’s wishing her happy birthday. ‘I’d be mad if you did this on my birthday’ says Mary. Noted.

Mike

This bit is actually pretty hard to write about. So far Mike’s been a joyful presence on screen, building a crisp shelter, talking to a Weka bird who’s trying to steal his stuff (they’re protected), and highlighting the risks of male suicide in older men.

So it was really rough to see him bend over to light a fire and suddenly start grunting and coughing and clutching his chest. He even says, ‘It’s really tight in my chest’.

When we come back to Mike it’s gone dark and he’s stumbling around, coughing, and generally struggling, it must’ve been hours.

 

Watching Mike struggle to call for help was gut wrenching to be honest

 

He pulls out the sat phone and honestly thank god, but I can see why he held off. It’s risky though – in a normal setting you probably wouldn’t think twice about calling for help in this situation – but there’s a lot on the line and it’s literally day two.

‘I’m so scared’, says Mike before hanging up his sat phone and no longer picking up.

And that’s the episode. Jesus, you can’t have more of a cliffhanger than that. I hope he’s ok, but I think he’s definitely off the show.

Next Week

It was pretty hard to pay attention to the rest of the preview for next week but we can see some pretty formal looking shelters, a net, and Leanne and Tamika looking serious.

We’re two days in, folks. It’s colder, there’s more food, and the standard seems higher. It’s shaping up to be an almighty showdown, that’s for sure.

Got thoughts? Leave them below in the comments or jump in to the chat on socials. We don’t love reality TV at We Are Explorers, but we bloody love Alone Australia and we can’t wait to experience it with you.

Read more: Alone Australia Season 2 – Everything You Need to Know

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